“I realized then that my approach had been entirely one-sided. I was so caught up in achieving that I hadn’t been listening to myself, let alone my horse. That accident forced me to pause, both physically and mentally. It was a wake-up call to shift my perspective and reevaluate what I truly wanted out of my time with horses.” - Chaela Sumner

The Art of Connection: The Perfect Piaffe vs. Being Present

In the equestrian world, perfection is often the ultimate goal. Riders strive for the flawless piaffe, the perfectly timed jump, or the ideal dressage test. While these pursuits are admirable and rewarding, I realized that I was losing sight of something just as important—being truly present with horses.

There was a time when I, like so many others, was chasing milestones and measurable achievements in my riding journey. I practiced tirelessly, pouring my energy into perfecting every movement and clearing every jump. But deep down, there was a subtle unease I couldn’t name. My horse was doing everything I asked (or not - we might have been arguing), but something felt missing—something vital.

The Turning Point

My turning point came in the most unexpected and painful way. During a riding lesson, I came off a horse and landed hard on my back. The impact was severe enough that I couldn’t walk for a month. As I lay in recovery, I had all the time in the world to reflect on what had gone wrong. That day, I didn’t want to be there. I had felt off, distracted, and disconnected—but I ignored all the signs because I was too focused on doing rather than being.

I realized then that my approach had been entirely one-sided. I was so caught up in achieving that I hadn’t been listening to myself, let alone my horse. That accident forced me to pause, both physically and mentally. It was a wake-up call to shift my perspective and reevaluate what I truly wanted out of my time with horses.

The Difference in Being

When I finally returned to working with horses—on the ground, this time—everything had changed. I stopped approaching my time with horses as a to-do list of skills to master and started focusing on being fully present with them. I began to notice the subtleties of their communication—the flick of an ear, the softness of an eye, or the way they moved when relaxed versus tense. Instead of pushing for the next level, I leaned into the connection we shared in each moment.

This shift brought profound changes. The horses I worked with became more engaged, more relaxed, and more willing to trust me. And I, in turn, became more attuned to them, developing a relationship based on mutual understanding and presence rather than performance.

Why Being Matters

Mastering skills like the piaffe or a perfect jump will always have its place in the equestrian world. But for me, the true reward lies in the moments of quiet connection—those times when I can simply "be" with my horse without any agenda or expectation. It’s in those moments that I’ve found the deepest joy and fulfillment.

Learning to be with horses rather than just doing, doing, doing and asking them to do things my way has not only transformed my relationship with them but also my perspective on life. It’s a reminder that sometimes, the greatest lessons come not from striving but from simply being present—and that’s where the real magic happens.